Hurt
by xoxogirlie
Summary: **Smitchie** Takes place after Mitchie's lie is revealed. Warning for cutting


**AN: So I've had a really bad week so I've been in the mood to write something sad and depressing. I will update "Saying Goodbye" probably tomorrow. I would've done it tonight but I don't want my bad mood to ruin it.**

"_Save it for your interview with Pop Informer Magazine. I know I gave you an earful." Shane scoffed at Mitchie and just walked away. _

_Mitchie was about to burst into tears when Caitlyn dragged her away from the crowd. "Not here you don't."_

Caitlyn led Mitchie back to her cabin. She grabbed all of her belongings and began shoving them into her bags. She was crying hysterically hiccuping every few seconds. Caitlyn put a hand on Mitchie's shoulder. "Mitchie," she began.

Mitchie's tearful expression met Caitlyn's eyes. "Caitlyn, can I please just be alone?"

"Are you going to be ok?" asked Caitlyn.

Mitchie nodded her head, but refused to look Caitlyn in the eye.

"If you need someone to talk to I'll just be in the mess hall."

Mitchie managed to whisper a thank you. After Caitlyn left Mitchie grabbed all of her stuff and headed back to her old cabin that she shared with her mom. She just knew her mom would be so ashamed of her when she found out what happened, that is, if she didn't already know. Mitchie sobbed some more. She arrived at her cabin, thankfully it was dinner hour so her mom wasn't there. Coming to camp was a mistake she thought. This summer was supposed to be the best summer of her life and now she had ruined everything. Not one person liked her, not Tess, not Ella, not Peggy, definitely not Shane, and even her mom wouldn't after this. She didn't have anyone, well except for Caitlyn, but soon she wouldn't want to be seen with Mitchie either. Mitchie knew what she had to do. She pulled out a pen and paper and began writing to three very special people. She delivered her letters to the cabins of those three people. She hadn't delivered them in person, but slid them under the doors. After delivering her letters she went back to her cabin to finish what she had started.

After hearing Mitchie's lies get exposed, Shane decided to take a walk to cool off. He couldn't believe that she was a complete fake. He had thought she was different, that she understood him, that she liked him for him, not because he was famous. He felt so incredibly betrayed. He had actually begun to fall for her too. He wanted to hit himself. He was such a complete idiot! He had taught himself long ago to put a wall around himself and not to let people in. Mitchie was the one person who had broken through that wall and he let her, for what? To get stabbed in the back is what. Shane was still fuming when he entered his cabin. He saw a small piece of yellow paper on the floor by his door. He saw whom it was from before he had even begun to read it. 'Mitchie,' he cringed. Against his better judgement he chose to read the letter.

_Dear Shane,_

_I'll be surprised if you actually read this but I had to write it. I know you don't want to hear my side of the story, but you need to know it. Shane, I never lied to you, I never told you that my mom worked at Hot Tunes. I told Tess, Ella, and Peggy, not you. You found out through everyone else. But anyway I wanted to tell you why I did it. You don't know what it feels like to be a nobody, you have people falling at your feet constantly. I just wish I could have something like that for just one day. In my hometown I have one friend, and no I'm not exaggerating. You don't know what it's like to be the shy person who has a hard time building up the courage to talk to someone, only to have them laugh in your face because you're not good enough to be seen with them. Nobody understands how I feel, not my mom, not you, not anyone. There isn't a person I can talk to about how I feel for that reason! So for just this once, I wanted to be someone. I wanted people to like me. I wanted to be popular to see what it felt like. I didn't plan on the whole charade to last this long and it seems the longer it lasted the deeper I got in. When you asked me in the canoe, about my mom's job at Hot Tunes, I really and truly wanted to tell you the truth, but I was petrified. I was afraid that this would happen. I know it's stupid. You do need to know though that not ONCE did I ever pretend around you. The entire time we spent together you spent it with Mitchie Torres, daughter of Connie Torres, the cook. I just want you to know that I have cherished every moment we spent together and I'll miss you. I realize that everyone hates me so I'm going to do everyone a favor and disappear (and no I don't mean going home) forever. I just wanted to say goodbye to three most important people in my life before well, I'm gone, that being you, my mom, and Caitlyn. I really am sorry for everything and I hope one day you'll forgive me. I'll be watching you. _

_Goodbye, _

_Mitchie _

The letter fell from Shane's hand as his body went numb for a moment. His eyes widened. 'Oh my god she's going to kill herself.' Shane's brain finally caught up with his body and he bolted out the door of his cabin rushing to get to Mitchie's before she did something terrible. Tess momentarily stopped him.

"Hey Shane," she said dragging out Shane's name.

Shane glared at her. "I don't have time for you!" He pushed past her picking up speed almost to Mitchie's cabin. Shane burst through the door of her cabin to see her standing there with a razor blade. Blood was already dripping down both arms but that didn't stop her from slicing her arm some more. As Mitchie lowered the blade to her left wrist Shane screamed, "MITCHIE NO!" She looked up in shock for a moment. Shane ran to her side and wrestled her for the blade.

Mitchie cried. "No Shane, I need it. I can't take it anymore!"

"Mitchie it's not worth it!"

"Yes it is, anything's better than this," she sputtered.

Shane was desperate. "Mitchie please give me the blade!" He grabbed her wrists and she winced from the pain. He quickly let go. She gripped the blade harder. The razor blade was now in her left hand and Shane grabbed her the lower portion of her left arm, just above her wrist. Her arm began to numb and she dropped the blade on the floor where Shane quickly retrieved it. He breathed a sigh of relief only for a moment.

"Shane give it back!"

"There isn't a chance in hell, that you're getting this back!" Mitchie's tears began to flow down her face at a quick pace and she slumped down against the wall. Shane couldn't believe how broken she was. He broke out of his reverie and saw how quickly she was losing blood. Grabbing the first piece of material he could think of he quickly removed his shirt. "Mitchie give me your wrist," Shane said softly. Mitchie obliged. He took his shirt and wrapped it tightly around her wrist. Her other wrist was still bleeding furiously. He panicked searching the room. He saw a scarf hanging out of her bag and grabbed it. He took her other hand and wrapped the scarf around her wrist just as tightly as the other one. Shane looked down and noticed that he had Mitchie's blood all over his hands. "Mitchie, we need to get you to a hospital, you lost a lot of blood."

"I don't care."

Shane got mad. "Well I do!" Shane got up. "We're heading over to the kitchen to tell your mom what happened and then she's going to drive us to the hospital to get you checked out."

"No! I don't want to face her, she'll be so ashamed."

"She'll be thankful you're alive! Now let's go!" Shane began to walk, but then looked behind him. Mitchie was extremely pale. As she tried to stand she wobbled a bit before her knees buckled and she fell back to the floor. "Oh dear god!" Shane cried. He went to Mitchie's side and picked her up bridal style. Shane was walking briskly to the kitchen as he noticed Mitchie's eyes drooping. "Mitchie? No you can't go to sleep on me now, wake up!"

"You wouldn't care if I never woke up," she whispered.

Shane stopped. "Don't you ever say that again! You have no idea how I feel right now or how I would feel!"

Mitchie began to feel herself fading in and out of consciousness. The walk to the kitchen had seemed like it had taken two hours when in actuality it had been approximately forty-five seconds. Shane burst through the kitchen doors causing all heads to turn, including both Connie's and Catilyn's. The first thing that Connie noticed was her semi-conscious daughter in Shane's arms. That's when she noticed the blood on his hands and the clothing tied around Mitchie's wrists. Realization hit her and her stomach dropped.

"Oh dear god no." Those were the only words Connie could muster up.

"Please help me! She needs a hospital I'm trying as hard as I can to keep her awake!" Shane's voice cracked.

Connie grabbed her keys and she, Shane, Mitchie, and Caitlyn all got into her catering van. She probably broke a ton of laws speeding to the hospital she didn't care, she needed her baby girl to be ok."

Guilt fell over Caitlyn. "I shouldn't have left her alone."

"Nobody knew she would do something like this."

Eventually they made it to the closest hospital. The doctors immediately took Mitchie away from Shane's arms. All they could do now was sit in the waiting room and wait. The room was silent. Connie broke the silence. "How did you know?" A few tears dropped.

Shane tried his best to keep his composure. "She left me a note. I think she left one for the two of you too," he said pointing to Connie and Caitlyn, "In it she kept apologizing for the whole lie, and she told me her reasoning behind it and then she told me that no one cared about her and that the world would be better off without her. This is all my fault!" He said,. "God I am such an asshole!" he yelled earning him a glare from a nurse. "Sorry," he whispered.

"Shane it's not your fault, nobody blames you," Connie said.

"I blame myself."

A doctor rounded the corner. "Michelle Torres?"

Connie jumped up along with the other two. "I'm her mother."

"Well, as I'm sure you already know it is apparent that your daughter tried to end her life this afternoon." Tears dropped from Connie's eyes as both Shane and Caitlyn looked at the ground. "The bleeding has stopped but she lost a lot of blood. She is unconscious but when she wakes up she may be a little disoriented from the blood loss. Also for the next six weeks she will need to take physical therapy to gain the feeling back in her hands."

"Oh my god," Connie breathed. "Thank you doctor! When can we see her?"

"Now if you like, room 232 one at a time please."

Connie looked at the other two. "You go first, you're her mother," Caitlyn said.

Connie entered Mitchie's room. "Hey there baby girl. It's just mom." She grasped her hand. "I never knew you were so down on yourself. If only I'd been more observant I don't know, maybe I could have prevented this. Sweetie, I'm not mad about your lie about me. I'm not ashamed of you. I love you! So many people do, me, your dad, Caitlyn, and that boy out there seems to like you quite a bit too."

Connie sat with Mitchie for about a half-hour before exiting the room. "Is she awake yet?" questioned Caitlyn. Shane was just staring at his shoes.

"Shane why don't you go in next? I'm sure she'd love to see you."

"Um, ok thanks." Shane got up and walked into Mitchie's room. He noticed oxygen tubes hooked up to her face and the bandages covering her wrists. "Um, hey Mitchie, it's me Shane. I know you probably don't want to see me right now, but you need to wake up. Your mom is going crazy over you right now. She needs you, Caitlyn needs you, hell, and even I need you. Yeah I never thought it would happen either, me, Shane Gray, needing someone, but it's true. You've changed me, for the better." Shane grasped her hand and squeezed it.

Mitchie's eyes fluttered open. Her eyes were squinted but she saw Shane. "What are you doing here?"

"Mitchie? Oh thank god." A huge grin spread across Shane's face. "How are you feeling?"

"Um ok I guess, my hands feel kinda fuzzy though like they're asleep or something."

"Yeah, the doctor said you would have to take physical therapy to regain the feeling in your hands."

"Oh, ok."

"How do you like your new bracelets?" Shane asked referring to the bandages.

Mitchie glanced at her wrists. "Oh well, um-."

"Why the hell would you do something so stupid? We've been sitting her worried sick. Your mom's trying to figure out where she went wrong and why she didn't notice you being depressed sooner, Caitlyn blames herself for leaving you alone, and well I blame myself for being an ass and not letting you explain yourself."

Mitchie giggled at the last part. "Well, you were hurt, it's understandable."

"No it's not, I swear Mitchie I've never been that scared. When I read that letter and I thought I might have lost you forever. I'm sorry, I'm so sorry!"

"Why were you so scared?"

"Because, I let you get closer to me than anyone ever has before. I have always built a wall around myself to protect myself, but somehow you broke through it. That's part of the reason why the lie hurt so much. If it had been anyone else such as Tess, I would've brushed it off and not cared. I like you Mitchie, and not in the way I like Jason and Nate, because frankly if I did, yeah I shudder just thinking about that."

"What are you saying?"

"Just what I said before I like you Mitchie." Shane stood up and leaned over Mitchie's bedside. "Do you like me?"

She just nodded. Shane grinned and bent down and kissed her. Shane placed his forehead against hers. With his eyes still shut he whispered, "Please don't ever do that to me again."

"I promise you if I'm ever feeling hurt or depressed I'll come straight to you, or to mom, or to Caitlyn."

"Thank you." Shane bent down and kissed her again.

**AN: Yeah I don't know if I like the ending, but I couldn't figure out a better way to end it and it's 3AM so I should probably go to bed. Anyway hope you like this please review!**


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